BENDING STEEL REVIEW: Indiana Jones and the Title That Never Seems to End

Posted by jadecanary on May 25, 2008

Are you serious? A F’n NUCLEAR EXPLOSION!!??

I have seen the Ark of the Covenant. I’ve seen a man pull the beating heart out of another man. And I have seen the cup of a carpenter save Sean Connery’s life. Even after all this, I would have never expected to see what I saw last night.

If I tell you even the smallest detail of the plot, I’ll pretty much blow the movie. About a half hour in, you’ll figure it out, too. The plot is predictable. The action sequences are good, very “Indy”, but, I know when I watched, I felt like they tried too hard. The romance is like watching your grandparents kissing.

Harrison Ford is 65 years old. And he shows it. He moves slower, even in Indy’s trademark hat. He broke out his trusty whip only a couple times. But that didn’t stop the Spielberg/Lucas duo. Oh No! Not these men. Indiana Jones went throiugh all the motions. But if you are fans of the first three films, you will notice.

Shia LaBeouf is our “Indy” newcomer, playing Mutt Williams. “Mutt? That’s the dog’s name!” (No, that quote is not in the movie, but it should have been >spoiler wink< ) LaBeouf is best know for dragging the Spielberg name out of the trash can following “War of the Worlds” and launching Micheal Bay’s commercial acting career (Awsome! ) starring in last year’s blockbuster “Transformers”. (I’m sure nobody out there reading this has ever heard of this movie) LaBeouf’s (whose last name is harder to type then Ford) character is greaser in the 1950s, obsessed with his hair and his switchblade. As the movie plays out, you see his character evolve into the man who will step into the roll next (if they can make any money off this film).

Overall, it isn’t a bad movie. As ridiculous as the plot is, if you start to reflect on the previous movies, you’ll see this isn’t such a stretch for the writers. Is there even anything left for Indy/Mutt to explore or find? ( “Indiana Jones/Mutt Williams and the Sword of Excalibur” perhaps?) B-


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